Things to Do in Hell (Michigan!): The Ultimate Pure Michigan Guide
Have you ever been to Hell? The residents of this tiny southeast Michigan town think it’s time you gave the place a try.
Located 20 miles northwest of Ann Arbor, Hell has heard all of the diabolical jokes. And they’ve made up a fair number of their own. The result makes for a fun road trip to a town chock-full of devilish puns, year-round Halloween décor and, truth be told, a lovely rural landscape.
Surrounding Livingston County includes acres of idyllic hill country and sparkling inland lakes. All told, Hell offers a heavenly Pure Michigan getaway.
Begin your Visit with Screams Ice Cream from Hell
A one-stop shop for Hellish fun, Screams offers food and fun that plays right into this Michigan town’s theme. The shop’s Creamatory serves up shakes, sundaes and scoops of ice cream. Have a go at the Grave Digger challenge, offering an honorary death certificate to anyone who can finish a full pound of ice cream presented in a miniature coffin. Out back, visitors play mini-golf with wickedly-themed holes. And inside, you can shop for humorous souvenirs, from “Go to Hell” hoodies to damnation-themed coffee mugs and headbands adorned with devil’s horns. While you’re shopping, pick up an advanced degree from Damnation University, with a diploma and a Dam U collegiate sweatshirt to prove it.
Check out Hell’s Government Services
Is it hotter than Hell? Colder than Hell? Maybe Hell has frozen over? Find out for yourself at Hell’s official U.S. weather observation station, and check out the celebrity names listed in the guestbook. Nearby, Hell’s U.S. Post Office singes souvenir postcards before sending them out. Send a scorched card to an enemy. Or wait until April 15, when you can join hundreds of procrastinators in sending lightly-charred tax returns to the IRS from Hell, Michigan.
Enjoy a Helluva Good Meal
Spicy-hot wings and club “witches.” Hot pepper-laden pizzas and “Satan dogs.” Hot cuisine fills the menu at the Hell Hole Diner. After your sinfully delicious meal, quench your thirst at the Hell Saloon.
As it turns out, even Hell has a Wedding Chapel, and for hundreds of lighthearted brides and grooms, Hell offers a fun take on a themed wedding. Organize the nuptials with Hell’s City Hall and, as the city’s mayor likes to say, a marriage made in Hell has nowhere to go but up.
Pose for Devilish Selfies
Take advantage of cartoon cut-outs located across Hell, creating images of horned demons and hellions that look suspiciously like…you! Don’t forget to shoot commemorative photos at your arrival and departure from Hell, standing beneath the town’s “Welcome to Hell” sign.
Explore the Great Outdoors
Once you’ve had your fill of Hell jokes, discover a little bit of heaven on the sparkling chain of lakes outside of town. The Pinckney State Recreation Area, encompassing 11,000 acres of green, rolling hills and numerous inland lakes, offers opportunities to picnic, hike, bike and ride horses. And you can paddle and fish Silver, North, South and Crooked Lakes, among others. Keep your eyes open for resident deer, beaver, eagles and other wildlife as well. Canoe and kayak rentals are available.
Meet the Nicest People in Hell
After an afternoon of bad puns and irreverent fun, you’ll discover that some of Michigan’s nicest people live in Hell. And it’s always a relief to know that when someone tells you, “See you in Hell!” they mean it in the nicest possible way.